Eric - Katie Couric thismroning

Eric - man

Eric - cause it's "where in the world is Matt Lauer" week

Eric - and he was in Moscow

Eric - talking about how Ivan the Terrible took out the guys eyes that designed the onion dome thing

kristin - yeah yeah.

kristin - oh right. so he couldn't do it again.

Eric - and Katie was like "what a meanie"

Eric - or osmething along those lines

Eric - i can't remember her exact words

Eric - but i was like you dumbass

kristin - HAHHAHAHA.

Eric - it wasn't "meanie" but it was along those lines

kristin - man if i have to look at the fuckin katie courick true hollywood story thing again where she gets the butt scope, i will PUNCH E! ENTERTAINMENT NETWORK IN THE HEAD.

Eric - the butt scope?

Eric - what?

Eric - she had a colonoscopy on camera?

kristin - YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES.

kristin - cause her husband died of colon cancer, so she was all RAISE AWARENESS, so she had it done, on camera and they aired it on the today show.

Eric - you know what i never want to hear about ever again?

kristin - and they play the footage of it on that E! special because god hates me.

kristin - okay what do you not want to hear about ever again.

Eric - Mel Gibson's Jesus movie

kristin - oh boy.

kristin - well, that hasn't even STARTED.

Eric - STOP

Eric - IT

kristin - and i get my newsweek, right and guess who is on the cover? cause it was jesus.

Eric - they've been talking about it for a couple of moments here and there

Eric - and it was like "who really killed jesus"

Eric - or something

Eric - cause they were interviewing the guy that wrote the article for Newsweek this mroning

kristin - yes. yes that's the whole thing.

kristin - that mel gibson's spin supposedly makes it look like it was the jews' fault.

kristin - and he said, in an interview "no, that's not what i'm saying. i love jews, i pray for them."

Eric - yeah adn they keep calling him an anti-semite

Eric - "i pray for them"

Eric - sheesh.

kristin - yeah i read most of the newsweek article actually

kristin - see. i think it is really really funny that the pope is somewhat involved in that he is supporting the movie.

Eric - i hope the movie does a huge fetal flop

kristin - "supporting" isn't exactly the right word, but you know what i mean.

kristin - and then they have that footage of him in the vatican with kids breakdancing.

Eric - the pope doesn't know what day it is

Eric - i cannot imagine taht bitch sat through the entire movie and actually paid attentino and followed what was goign on

Eric - they must have showed it on the floor since he's head seems to be permanently pointed down

kristin - well thank you.

kristin - poor john paul

Eric - enough already

Eric - i think the pope should have to pass a compitency test every year once it gets to that level of incoherence

kristin - if they don't elect a latino mother it will be SOSO WRONG because they are the A NUMBER 1 CHEERLEADERS OF CATHOLOCISM.

kristin - mom thinks it'll be an eyetalian

Eric - eye-tailian everydat

Eric - seriously though, latino mother

Eric - stat

Eric - CRAZY for CHRIST

kristin - yes bring on some puerto ricans!

kristin - they are LOCO FOR MARIA.

Eric - uh huh

Eric - i'll get the white passenger van

Eric - you blow the air horn

kristin - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHAHHAAHA.

kristin - VAMANOS!

Eric - *AIR HORN*

Eric - JESUS CHRISTOS

kristin - HAHAHHAHA.

kristin - DIOS MIO!

Eric - oh totally

kristin - have some paRADES.

kristin - parades for the padre

Eric - bang some pots

kristin - give money you don't have to the church

Eric - parades for the padre

kristin - you know how it rolls.

Eric - uh huh

Eric - laides, get your scarves

kristin - and i mean, seriously, not a spanish from spain pope, either.

kristin - i'm talking let's get down with some mexicans, south americans, puerto RICANS

kristin - yes. get your rosaries ladies.

kristin - it's time to bead these beads

kristin - can you imgaine if like a mexican mo were elected pope?

kristin - CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT VICENTE FOX WOULD HAVE ON HIS HANDS?

Eric - i think my building would blow up

kristin - there is not enough tissue paper and shitty shitty mexican candy in this WORLD to fill the pinata orders.

Eric - no there really isn't

kristin - and, of course, california would just fall off

Eric - or beads to make those rosaries

Eric - yup

kristin - and arizona would have beachfront.

Eric - and texas

Eric - and arizona

kristin - maybe we should move there.

Eric - true

Eric - Florida

Eric - BLOW

Eric - THEM

Eric - AWAY

Eric - florida would get lopped off and it would kick cuba into orbit

Eric - that's how crazy it would be

kristin - gulf of mexico????????????????????????????

kristin - tsunami

Eric - i'd be like a full body baptism

Eric - for the ENTIRE CONTINENTAL US

Eric - and some portions of Canada

kristin - and PS, i think that this whole el nino thing would kick into punch it chewy. it's just WAITING for the moment.

Eric - winding up

Eric - and then it would be go time

kristin - yep.

Eric - BAH-WHOOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!

kristin - cinco de mayo would look like a fucking funeral

Eric - those fuckin mexican masks mom has would come to life

kristin - (just bunch of drunk white people like funerals are anyway)

kristin - and the billboard chart #1 hit: that one mariachi song that they sing every time.

Eric - and ave maria would be on a costant loop

Eric - Charo would become queen of the world

kristin - HAHAHHAHHAA.

Eric - and sing that song she did on Facts of Life

kristin - AND "FRIDA" WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE MONEY

Eric - uh huh

Eric - man

Eric - i gotta run to the other building

Eric - be back on stat

Eric - to continue discussion RE: the Mexican take over

Eric - oooh

Eric - you know what else?

kristin - what?

Eric - George Lopez Show would actually get ratings

kristin - HAHAHAHAH.

kristin - TRUE.

Eric -

Eric - k

Eric - be back

0 Comments So Far

< - >

THAT BITCH - 2005-07-15
JEOPARDY - 2005-06-24
PB&J DAY - 2005-06-16
NOISES - 2005-03-16
COULD WE TALK MORE ABOUT DIPS AND DIPPING? I DON'T THINK SO. - 2005-03-04

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