For the past couple of weeks, Eric, mon cher, has been hyper busy at work, and also having trouble with AIM, so I would like to introduce my IM partner in crimes (plural), Max. He is awesome, you will heart him. He will be in the area in a couple of weeks, and we are going to meet for drinks! T-R-O-U-B-L-E!

Kristin - because as everyone knows

Kristin - to speak spanish, you just add an "o" onto whatever word

Max - like tao

Max - err

Max - taco

Kristin - going-o to-o el gas station-o

Max - gotta throw el in there too

Kristin - yeah just pepper it with els and las

Kristin - throw em in wherever

Max - 1-888-SPANGLISH.edu-o

Kristin - absolutely

Max - oh i have a story for you

Max - well two actually

Max - 1)

Kristin - k

Max - so on sunday we went to a festival called Obon in Jappertown here

Kristin - haha

Kristin - uh huh

Max - and we proceeded to share 24 beers and 3 tall boys between myself, my roommate darin, and the out of place in japan town mexican friend daniel

Max - before and during hand

Max - so

Max - we're walking down the street

Kristin - mm hm

Max - (after getting kicked out of a karaoke bar at 7pm after singing for 2 hours and darin accidently pouring beer in their monitor which broke it)

Max - and danny decides to push big ole darin

Max - darin is 6'6"

Kristin - oh my

Kristin - haha

Max - he pushes him from behind and darin like a giant giraffe goes toppling forward

Max - falling on top of his girlfriend jamie

Max - she ends up with a big knot on her forehead

Max - from hitting the pavement

Max - and darin ends up with a twisted ankle

Kristin - she gotta goose egg?

Kristin - aw

Max - and yet another f-ed up injury to his heel

Max - which he previously hurt singing karaoke

Kristin - that happened to me once (skeeball incident)

Max - doing a stage jump

Kristin - you guys are ANIMALS!

Max - we take karaoke VERY seriously

Max - hahaha

Max - aww damn

Max - i forgot story #2

Max - hoops

Max - so i went and played putt putt last night

Max - and airhockey

Max - our golf course has a 360 degree loopdy loop you have to hit the ball through

Max - it's C-Razy!

Kristin - whoa!

Max - i almost decapitated jamie with the air hockey puck too

Max - oops

Max - tell me about skeeball!

Kristin - skeeball:

Kristin - my friend's 13th b-day = we go to this chuck e cheese place that is not chuck e cheese

Kristin - they had skeeball

Kristin - i was sitting down eating my pizza.

Kristin - a person playing skeeball must've really put some sauce on it, because it ricocheted out of the skeeball area, flew about 20 feet, and hit me right in the middle of my forehead

Max - is it wrong to laugh?

Kristin - not at all

Max - HAHAHAHAHAHA

Max - oh my god

Kristin - yeah

Max - what luck

Kristin - i totally saw it coming too

Kristin - it was one of those john woo style moments, where it took like 30 seconds from the time i saw the ball, to the time it hit me

Max - awww

Max - that almost happened to me last night

Max - wayward golf ball

Max - i watched it sail past me

Max - all crazy

Max - it was some 13 year old girl

Max - enamored with my beauty

Max - who could blame her!

Max - i try and turn off the sexy

Max - but i just. can't. help it.

Max - have i told you about the drink we made up called the "OH! Damn!"

Kristin - no.

Kristin - please, elaborate.

Max - grape soda and bacardi.

Max - to be eaten with fried chyaken and hot sauce

Max - NO napkins

Max - hush puppies optional

Kristin - greeeeeeeeezy

Kristin - kristin <3 hushpuppies

Max - and they <3 you!

Kristin - puffy corn things are so good

Max - then there's its counterpart the gosh darn which is root beer and whipped cream

Max - for those mormons

Kristin - if they were mormons, it would have to be pepsi

Kristin - and cool whip

Max - pepsi has caffeine though

Max - i don't think root beer does

Kristin - yeah but pepsi is owned by the mormons

Kristin - just like chick-fil-a

Max - damn them

Kristin - yep

Kristin - and their weird underwear

Max - weird underwear?

Kristin - yeah the hardcore mormons have special undergarments

Max - is that like the hole in the bedsheet crap?

Kristin - i am not too sure

Max - which, btw, is LAAAAAAME

Kristin - hole in the bedsheet

Kristin - i mean come on now

Max - yeah, hi, boobies RULE

Max - wtf

Max - real life slapstick is hilarious

Max - when it's not intentional

Max - when i was in las vegas

Max - we were in bumper to bumper traffic going to the warped tour

Max - and this kid

Max - probably 15

Max - was wearing a korn shirt or something lame

Max - was all self-conscious cause we were all bored and staring at him

Max - and he slips on some palm fronds on the sidewalk and BAM

Max - right to the floor

Kristin - hahaha

Max - we SOMEhow held it in until he passed

Kristin - people falling is comedy gold

Max - oh totally

Kristin - that's why i love america's funniest home videos

Max - especially when they get hit first and THEN fall

Kristin - and it makes me laugh like a crazy

Max - ok so darin's cousin kevin is from whittier

Max - and he was waiting for an ATM

Max - respectfully a few steps back

Max - there's a skinny girl at the ATM

Max - getting money out

Max - and a HUGE whale of a girl comes down the sloped street

Max - on ROLLERBLADES

Kristin - uh oh

Kristin - HAHAHA

Max - she totally biffs it and SLAMS into the skinny girl at the ATM

Kristin - i sense trips to the dentist

Max - who does the bird hitting an open window pose of both arms totally out, head to one side PLASTERED against the ATM

Max - the funniest part is imagining what the security camera caught

Max - some guard was laughing his ass off i guarantee it

Kristin - oh totally

Max - kevin fell down laughing

Max - slapstick is his FAVorite

Kristin - i am such a sucker for accidental slapstick

Kristin - and the coconut noise when heads hit on 3 stooges

Kristin - but as far as pie-in-the-face staged slapstick...*yawn*

Max - yeah

Max - word

Max - hey did you know i totally know how to kill zombies?

Max - i was thinking about it yesterday when i was at big 5 looking at semi auto shotguns

Max - i thought, i can kick some zombie ass with this thing

Kristin - can you kill zombies?

Max - oh totally

Kristin - with what, though?

Max - anything

Max - you have to hit them in the brain

Max - golf club

Kristin - and they're SO SLOW-MOVING

Kristin - that is ridiculous

Kristin - what an easy enemy

Max - well, they're not as slow as you might think

Kristin - (listen to me)

Max - and their strength is in numbers

Kristin - (and then listen to yourself)

Kristin - hahahahaha

Max - i'm totally serious

Max - hahahahhaa

Max - see the problem with killing zombies is that people freak out

Max - and get all panicky

Max - if you just take your time and find a good spot where you can narrow them down

Kristin - well, you just have to be brave and hit them in the head

Max - you're set

Kristin - it's one of those things

Max - like beer

Kristin � HAHAHAHAH.

3 Comments So Far

< - >

THAT BITCH - 2005-07-15
JEOPARDY - 2005-06-24
PB&J DAY - 2005-06-16
NOISES - 2005-03-16
COULD WE TALK MORE ABOUT DIPS AND DIPPING? I DON'T THINK SO. - 2005-03-04

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